What Are I Statements?

“I statements” are a communication technique that enables individuals to express their thoughts, emotions, and needs clearly and assertively. By utilizing “I statements,” individuals take ownership of their feelings and avoid placing blame or making accusations.

These statements typically start with the word “I,” which allows individuals to express themselves while promoting open and effective dialogue honestly. They encourage active listening and empathy, facilitating understanding and conflict resolution in personal and professional contexts.

An “I” statement is a form of communication that emphasizes the emotions or convictions of the speaker rather than the thoughts and traits that the speaker assigns to the listener.

Using “I” statements helps convey that you are taking ownership of your emotions and actively working on managing them while also expressing the need for assistance from the other person.

The distinction between I and You statements lies in their impact on communication dynamics. While You statements tend to assign blame and evoke defensiveness, I statements facilitate personal expression, uphold personal control, and foster confidence. Utilizing I statements enables the cultivation of productive and respectful communication.

Importance Of I statements

1. It helps you express yourself efficiently, taking full responsibility and not dishing out blame.
2. It helps you create a safe atmosphere for communications as it is non-confrontational.
3. It fosters active listening and encourages the other person to understand your emotions.
4. It builds trust and respect.
5. It is also a great conflict-resolution tool.

How To Write/Use I Statements 

It is important to consider certain factors to utilize I statements and express your true feelings effectively. The following guide can help you understand how to use I statements effectively.

• Use “I” at the beginning of your word or writing.
• Be sure to be specific without beating about the bush. State the particular situation or action affecting you.
• Use expressive language to describe your feelings.
• Focus on expressing yourself and avoid accusations and placing blame.
• State the impact of the behaviour on you and state what you need from the other person.

Examples Of I statements

• I feel concerned and confused when you don’t answer my calls. It makes me wonder if something is wrong. I would appreciate it if we could talk about this and find a way to improve our communication.
• I would love to know how you feel about going back to India.
• I felt embarrassed when you told your friends I have bad eating habits.
• I am disappointed with your attitude.
• I am frustrated the children always mess up the house after i have cleaned thoroughly.
• I felt hurt when you made that comment.
• I feel concerned about our future and would like to discuss our plans for starting a family.