Temperament -Understanding the 4 temperaments for a lasting relationship


Temperament -Maintaining your relationship by understanding your temperament


Temperament has a great effect on any relationship we go into. Knowing your partner and friend’s temperament will go a long way in not only your relationship but also his you relate with people around you. As long as this world is concerned, people have different behaviour and character.

Everyone has his/her own temperament. Temperament is God’s unique way of creating varieties and spice to life and not adversity. Adversity comes in when we think the other person should be like us.

A temperament could be defined as a person’s nature as it affects their behaviour permanently. Basically, there is four major temperaments. They are sanguine, phlegmatic, choleric and melancholy. In addition, there is a temperament blend.

This means that one person might have at least two temperaments. One major and one minor.
If all the temperaments are blended, we will have twelve temperament blends. No temperament can be considered superior or inferior. All temperaments are important. Let look at each temperament and their differences. Introvert (Phlegmatic and Melancholy) and Extrovert (Choleric and Sanguine).


To know if your friend is sanguine, note the following:

They are usually friendly because of natural charisma hence many friends. They are considered as talkative – storytellers. In terms of communication, they can start up a conversation easily. They hate dull moments, this makes them create humour or make a play lively.

Your sanguine friend can be so emotional and exaggerates a lot. He/she might end up in too many debt because they believe that money will come. You must be ready to listen because they never lack what to say at any time. He/she will hate indoor and stationed activities. They prefer outdoor and interesting moments.

You must be ready to accommodate his/her multitude of friends. They are sometimes weak-willed. Because they talk a lot, it might be difficult for a sanguine to keep a secret. They need motivation a lot and they are very romantic in nature.


They are the direct opposite of the sanguine. They are the best combination for sanguine and choleric. They are regarded as learned leaders. They are easy-going, good listeners. They are not bossy usually diplomatic. They are good at mediating and observing before speaking, because of these they are considered unromantic. Some might not be interested in love or relationship.

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A phlegmatic avoid trouble at all costs. They are known as peace seekers; they avoid arguments. They hardly volunteer for leadership positions. They love their quiet time but love to be in the company of lovely people (sanguine). They rarely/hardly express emotions. They try to avoid outdoor activities because they are shy. Sometimes, they crawl out of their shy shell to have fun. When angered, they try to be calm and relax. They rarely react when angered.

They are excellent parents but weak disciplinarians. They are contented with what they have. They rarely go out on dates due to procrastination. They can be very stubborn and lazy. They can die in silence even when it’s hurting. They can fit in anywhere. Therefore, they are usually called the leveller of all. They do not love recommendations or being noticed. They are good secret keepers and forgives easily.


They are born leaders and can lead effectively. They are hot-headed/tempered. They are easily aroused by anger. They love open recommendations as well as to be publicly praised. They are dynamic people who dream the impossible. They are a kind of similar to the sanguine because they are outgoing and optimistic. They have a strong will.

They love taking control of everything. They take decisions in a haste and live in regret for life. They are more interested in achieving their set goals than pleasing people. They are not pleasers of people. They do not love lazy people; therefore they share responsibilities for everyone.

They demand for respect a lot. They are good planners. They want to be in control at all times. They see an expression of emotion(love) as a weakness but are easily given into anger.


They are good thinkers, organisers and planners. They do not spend unnecessarily unlike the sanguine. Hence, they are very calculative. They are good at analysing and providing solutions to problems. Just like the phlegmatic, they do not like outdoor activities.

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They love their quiet time and love avoiding crowds or where people gather.
They are extreme perfectionists. They hate dirty environments and prefer appearing clean. They are slow in taking decisions such that they take time to dig deep into issues before reacting. They rarely get angry. They dislike noisy places.

They always appear serious; rarely smile. Unlike the sanguine that scatters things, the melancholy loves orderliness. They do not waste things but will keep the leftover.
They dislike being thrown into confusion that’s why they are careful when making friends. You might regard them as snub because they do not talk anyhow.

They count their words consciously. Unlike the phlegmatic that forgives easily, the melancholy keep things to heart and hardly forgive when offended. They are usually well dressed, neat and tidy. They are good listeners, good problem solvers as well as good counsellors. Of all the temperaments, they are considered as the most talented and creative because of their ability to think. They often go into mood swing though they are faithful partners.


No temperament should be considered superior to the other. We should try as much as we can to accommodate the excesses of each temperament for a smooth relationship

IGBAJI U.C.https://igbajiugabi.com
Igbaji Ugabi Chinwendu, from Cross River State, Nigeria. As a Business Educator, he is profoundly interested in teaching and managing business. Started blogging 2010 and officially 2013. He holds the esteemed positions of Chief Executive Officer (CEO) and Director at Freemanbiz Communication and Writers King LTD, demonstrating his leadership and expertise in the field.


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